Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
whose ass print is on the piano?
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize