OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize