Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize