I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
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