yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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