I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
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