i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
organizing the empties. That sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Randomize