Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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