My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
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I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
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If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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