i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
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