your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
There are leaves in my underwear?
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize