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  • 80 58
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 7, 10 at 4:20pm

    maybe you should move out of your parents house if you care so much what your mom thinks.

  • 80 65
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 7, 10 at 4:46pm

    tell her it's less of an excuse, and more like a way of life

  • 88 82
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 7, 10 at 8:55pm

    I have small wang cuz I asian

  • 68 50
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 7, 10 at 7:31pm

    IN SOVIET RUSSIA IT ALWAYS 5 O'CLOCK AT YOUR MOM'S!!!!!

  • 79 84
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 7, 10 at 4:14pm

    Your mom can eat shit, drown in her own shit-eating vomit, and go to fucking hell.

  • 71 69
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 7, 10 at 4:19pm

    I've used that line many times in my life

  • 72 73
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 7, 10 at 4:17pm

    And I bet your Dad is getting tired of your Mom's frequent headaches and your over-achievement.

  • 70 72
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 7, 10 at 8:59pm

    but it's not 5 somewhere all the time, except on the hour...

  • 68 71
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 8, 10 at 3:20am

    Dumb excuse/song/post

  • 66 67
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 7, 10 at 5:03pm

    There are few things more enjoyable in this life than the sound of wet ass cheeks smacking together as a dick gets impaled into the butthole :)

  • 62 64
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 9, 10 at 10:20pm

    Dude my mom is the one giving me the excuse that it's always 5 o'clock somewhere.... Consider yourself lucky that you don't have a Mom thats drunk at 5 in the morning.... She even has a clock that is nothing but 5's

  • 61 64
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 8, 10 at 11:30am

    Then move out of the basement loser.

  • 64 71
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 7, 10 at 4:24pm

    Your mom let me sodomize her last night. Sodomy is the new foreplay. Spread the word kids!

  • 54 52
    Submitted by Carma1369 on May 16, 10 at 2:45am

    Yea..that was funny like 5 years ago...maybe!

  • 62 69
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 7, 10 at 4:13pm

    Fifth suckasssss!!!!! Ohhh yeaaaa!

  • 59 68
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 7, 10 at 5:39pm

    Your mom is getting really tired of swallowing my stiff black dick every night.

  • 60 71
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 7, 10 at 4:15pm

    Oh...jk then just 6th :(