where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
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