Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize