this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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