It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
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Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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