I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.