I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
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surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.