I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Send us your Text From Last Night!
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.