Texts From Last Night · butterfly512's Favorites

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butterfly512's Favorites Texts:

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(612): View more from Minnesota

I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.

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(904): View more from Florida

Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea

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(804): View more from Virginia

when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"

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(310): View more from California

So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(720): View more from Colorado

so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass

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(574): View more from Indiana

no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"

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(807): View more from Ontario

I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.

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(641): View more from Iowa

since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.

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