did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
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