It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
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