Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize