I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
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We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
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I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
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