Im at strip club and am horny
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
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