I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
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She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
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