I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Your cock deserves a montage
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Randomize