What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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