i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
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