Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize