THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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