im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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