i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
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Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
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I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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