hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I am midnight drunk by noon
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Randomize