i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
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