There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
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