just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
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Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
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Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
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