dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Every concussion has its silver lining
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Randomize