i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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