my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
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