Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
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just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
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Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
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