I could make wine with my vomit
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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