The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Thank you for not boning my boss.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Randomize