dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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