Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
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ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
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