The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
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