I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize