my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
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Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
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The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
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