it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Randomize