So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
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Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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